Is Your Divorce Attorney Really On Your Side?

The corruption, collusion, and abuse that happens in the Family Court system is truly appalling. How does a person protect themselves? How do you know if your attorney is one of the “good ones”?

In this blog posting Nancy Hetrick lists 10 questions when interviewing divorce attorneys to help you sort through the maze.

Keeping the House - Mortgage Refinancing During a Divorce

If you’re considering divorce, the first question for most couples is: “What should we do with the house?”

The family home is usually the biggest asset to divide. Plus, it’s more than just property. You may have ties to the neighborhood, your kids are happy in their school, and you’ve invested time, energy and love into creating a home there.

If one spouse decides to keep the house in divorce, refinancing gives you a way to access the equity in the home so one spouse can buy out the other. There are some unique challenges to getting a mortgage during a divorce, but armed with the right knowledge, you can protect yourself financially and do what’s best for your family.

In this excellent article Jeff Weaver writes about four of the most common questions and how to deal with them.

Special Needs Children and Divorce

Negotiating a divorce agreement is never easy, regardless of how amicable the separation. Not many people can manage to keep their emotions out of it, especially in matters regarding children.  Negotiations related to the best interests of special needs children may present a number of additional hurdles. It is not uncommon for divorcing couples in these circumstances to choose divorce mediation.

In this excellent article Dr. Lynne C. Halem writes that parents of special needs children may find comfort in knowing that the process of divorce mediation provides a platform for cooperation, aiming to achieve mutual agreements that will protect the interests of the child. Parents with special needs children who elect to mediate their divorce, or at the least their parenting plans and custodial arrangements, produce agreements that best serve their children.

Some of the questions that can be addressed in mediation include:

• Where will the child reside?
• How is child support calculated for parents with special needs children?
• Are any of these costs borne by the state, or will they be in the future?
• What kind of custodial arrangements are made in the event of the death of either parent?
• How will information about the child’s IEP and other evaluative reports be shared?
• How do parents determine services to be used for the child?
• How is the daily schedule structured?

Helping Your Business Survive a Divorce

While divorce is difficult for everyone, the fairy tale of "happily ever after" can become an absolute nightmare if the couple co-own a business.

If you're an owner involved in a divorce, think ahead. Laying a legal foundation and staying calm can make a stressful situation, while never pleasant, less traumatic than it would otherwise have been if both parties start shooting from the hip. In this excellent article, Arkady Bukh offers six guidelines:

• Handle the emotional fallout before emotions become the focus.
• Discuss the future -- early.
• Find attorneys who can empathize.
• Opt for a 'collaborative' divorce.
• Use mediation.
• Employ multiple options.

How do Smart People Divorce?

People often fail to realize how much of our perception about divorce is shaped by fiction: Television programs and films that depict divorce as dramatic and hostile. Yet most people know examples of divorced couples whose divorce was calm and civilized, and who remain friendly and even sociable afterwards. How did they manage this? Chances are they were smart about divorce.

In this excellent article Susanne Hale writes about how smart people divorce.

If you or someone you know could benefit from assistance in decision making during a divorce, contact Falmouth Mediation at 508-566-4159 for a free, no-obligation, private, confidential consultation. We will be happy to discuss the key details of your situation, address any concerns, and help you decide if divorce mediation would be beneficial.

Why Divorce Mediation Is an Appealing Alternative to a Court Fight

Couples who decide to end their marriage are often dealing with the most upsetting, stressful time of their lives, and the prospect of fighting tooth and nail in court to decide issues like child custody, visitation, and finances only piles on the emotional trauma.

In this excellent article from BusinessWest.com, Joseph Bednar writes that’s why divorce mediation — a less costly, less stressful alternative to a contested divorce — is gaining in popularity. It’s a process that doesn’t deal in who’s right or wrong, but allows two people to take control of a bad situation and talk it out — often for the first time in years.

If you or someone you know could benefit from assistance in decision making during a divorce, contact Falmouth Mediation at 508-566-4159 for a free, no-obligation, private, confidential consultation. We will be happy to discuss the key details of your situation, address any concerns, and help you decide if divorce mediation would be beneficial.

Avoiding The Financial Pitfalls Of Divorce

If you’ve arrived at a place in your marriage where you’re certain continuing is just not possible, then it’s time to do some preparation—the key to safely navigating this life transition.

Michael F. Kay writes that when emotions typically take center stage when a relationship has deteriorated beyond repair—and it’s safe to say that good financial decision-making and emotions rarely mix well. So while it’s challenging to deal with money issues rationally when you’re blanketed in pain, you want to give it your best shot.

Some couples (usually seething with anger and hurt), seek to hire the toughest and most aggressive “shark” attorney who will look to pound their adversary into pulp. At the end of this lengthy and expensive process, their private lives are laid open to public scrutiny.

A more sensible is when each party decides that the best possible outcome is not punishment, but the preservation of as much wealth as possible. In this case, there are better and more rational approaches available, such as mediation.

Are You Really Ready for Divorce?

Your marriage is in question and you're facing a real dilemma. You may be the one who is deciding should you stay or should you go.

In this outstanding article, Bruce Derman and Wendy Gregson write that most couples who begin a divorce are unprepared and are often not even on the same page when they begin. It is this lack of preparedness and readiness for a divorce that either causes marriages to end prematurely or divorces to deteriorate into competitive contests.

The decision to obtain a divorce is one of the most crucial decisions a person can make with consequences that last for years or a lifetime. A decision this important requires much greater attention than it is usually given by both couples and professionals. It is a process in and of itself. Once a couple is prepared and ready, they will sooner be able to begin their divorce by both being on the same page and this will eliminate most of the emotional and financial struggles that cause divorces to become adversarial and ruthless.

If you or someone you know could benefit from assistance in decision making during a divorce, contact Falmouth Mediation at 508-566-4159 for a free, no-obligation, private, confidential consultation. We will be happy to discuss the key details of your situation, address any concerns, and help you decide if divorce mediation would be beneficial.

Consider a Mediator Before Getting a Lawyer for Your Divorce

Divorce is often a time when a person finally gets the courage to stand up and speak, yet is rarely a time when listening is happening. Speaking tends to be more in the form of demands and insults due to hurt and anger. Strangely enough, divorce is a time when the parties really do need to talk, and more importantly listen, in order to successfully get through the divorce process and to be effective co-parents for the future.  Unfortunately the litigation process of divorce does not encourage listening. Being heard, truly heard, creates an atmosphere of understanding and empathy. This is the premise of meditation, and facilitates robust and mature discussion.

In this excellent article from women24 discusses how these discussions, whilst effectively listening to the other person’s fears and needs, can lead to an agreement that is workable for both people. Due to the agreement being creatively shaped by both parties, there is an investment and an ownership over the process that is rarely experienced through litigation. This goes a long way to creating success in future problem resolutions with regards to parenting and maintenance.

10 Key Questions for Caring Co-Parents

Divorced parents face challenges that are not only complex; they are long lasting as well. There are many variations of joint parenting, co-parenting and other forms of divorced parenting based on how well both parents get along, their geographical proximity, the age of the children and other contributing factors. Every decision made will affect the children involved -- and the impact can be detected in children’s behavior, attitudes and levels of self-esteem.

In this excellent blog posting, Rosalind Sedacca offers a list of significant questions to ask yourselves. If you sit together and discuss these questions, or review them during mediation, it can help you avoid serious mistakes and unnecessary strife now and well into the future.
The more honest you are with yourself and your former spouse, the easier for your children to move on after divorce into their new reality.

The Cost of Litigated Divorce Keeps Going Up

Westchester County, NY may be a bit pricier than Southeast Massachusetts.  Still, attorneys asking for a minimum retainer of $25,000 still seems absurd.

If you are contemplating a divorce, and you think that mediation is a waste of time, you might want to think again.  If you try mediation and it doesn’t work, you can always spend $25,000 on a retainer - and even more as the litigation drags on.

But if you can work things out in mediation, your savings can be enormous. And in 2016, the savings will be even greater.

Charity Calls for Law Change to Stop Kids Getting Caught Up in Divorce Courts

“Parents often lose focus on their children as they battle with their ex-partner to determine who gets what, and who the children are going to live with.  During a crisis or emotional meltdown it’s not realistic to expect parents to research all their options.

Making it a requirement to consider mediation before going to court is the way forward.
Research shows that mediation is quicker, less costly and more effective than court action in helping divorcing and separating couples.

Mediation helps parents make a decision to work together in the best interests of their children. We need to act now to help parents and families find their own solutions."

These are the words of Stuart Valentine, chief executive of Relationships Scotland,
advocating to make it a legal requirement that divorcing parents must consider mediation to prevent thousands of kids being stuck in the middle of court action.