How Therapy Can Benefit Children Of Divorce

How divorce affects children of divorce is well documented. Although the amount of parental conflict kids are exposed to is more harmful than the actual event of divorce, the fact is that dealing with divorce is difficult. Your kids need your support now more than ever.

Fortunately, there are plenty of things you can do to help offset the effects of divorce on children, but you only have so much power. Depending on how your kids react, it might be worth enlisting the help of a counselor or therapist to aid in their divorce recovery.

In this excellent article, Sean Garrison writes about how to know if your child’s issues are likely to resolve over time or if you need outside help, how to find a child therapist, and what to expect from child therapy.

An Age-By-Age Guide For Helping Children Through Divorce

Research tells us that children of divorce face many risks. It is a major challenge for kids to cope with the drastic change that is inevitable after their parents split and that adjustment is even tougher if they are exposed to the conflict of divorce. 

 

How children of divorce respond to news of their parents’ split can also vary wildly depending on their age. Your 4-year-old toddler is probably going to take the news of your divorce a whole lot differently than your 15-year-old who is about to get their driver’s license.

In this excellent article, Shawn Garrison offers an age-by-age guide walking you through how children are likely to respond to your divorce. You also will find tips for how you can help ease this difficult transition for them.

No matter your child’s age, the best thing you can do to ensure a healthy adjustment after your divorce is ensuring that they have a strong and loving relationship with both parents.

When couples with significant assets decide to get divorced, it can become a costly and protracted proceeding. The average cost for divorce attorney fees in Massachusetts ranges between $12,500 and $14,500. But high net worth couples are not average, they have many unique issues that take more time to resolve, and their legal fees are often much higher.

With so much property and assets at stake, there is the potential for a long and drawn out court battle. And before everything is said and done, you could find that a substantial portion of your net worth is eaten up in legal fees. It doesn’t have to be this way, however.

 

There are better alternatives these days for high net worth couples, and divorce mediation is an increasingly preferred method. Through mediation, a couple can resolve all of their issues outside of court, so it officially becomes an uncontested divorce. This is not to say that there are no issues along the way, it is just that the couple chooses to work them out on their own with the help and guidance of a professional, third-party divorce mediator.

An uncontested divorce that is done through mediation can save high net worth couples tens of thousands of dollars or more in legal costs, and the couple can complete their divorce in a fraction of the time it would take for the process to go through court. These are not the only benefits of mediation, however. There are several others as well, including:

• Cooperative Environment: Because divorce mediation is done in a collaborative setting, there is a greater likelihood of reaching an satisfactory agreement. The process also allows you to avoid what could be a highly contentious court battle with the potential to foster lasting bitterness between the spouses. The ability to preserve delicate family relationships is especially important if there are children involved.

• Confidential Process: Mediation sessions are held confidentially, and nothing that is discussed ever becomes part of the public court record. This allows participants to speak more freely knowing their words will not be held against them later on, and for high net worth couples, it also helps ensure that no part of their divorce proceeding ever ends up in the media.

• Flexible Settlements: Family courts tend to take more of a cookie-cutter approach to divorce settlements, one of the main reasons being that they simply do not have time to delve too deeply into each individual case. As a result, divorced couples can end up with a final settlement that no one is happy with. Divorce mediation is different. During mediation, you can spend as much time as you need to on the issues that matter most, and you and your spouse have the freedom and flexibility to get creative and come up with win-win resolutions that work for everyone.

• More Control over the Process: At the end of the day, the participants are the ones who must agree to any settlement that is produced during divorce mediation. The process is entirely voluntary, and nothing can be imposed on either of the spouses against their will. This gives the spouses a large amount of control over the process, and it also makes it more likely that they will take ownership of what is agreed to and follow through on all of their obligations.

Virtual Court Hearings: 15 Simple Tips for Success in Zoom Court

As the global pandemic drags on, courts across the country have had to adapt. Many courts have now started conducting virtual court hearings, and even virtual trials. While these virtual “Zoom Courts” have kept our justice system moving, they have also created new challenges for lawyers and clients alike.

In some ways our new “virtual normal” has its benefits. You now can attend your court hearing without having to worry about driving, parking, getting through court security, or even wearing pants.

On the other hand, having to deal with technology and new procedures can make your court appearance now more stressful than ever.

Since virtual court hearings are probably not going away any time soon, learning how to manage the technology is a must for anyone who has a case in court today.

In this excellent blog posting, Karen Covy offers 15 simple tips that will help make your zoom hearing go smoothly.

• Make Sure You Have A Reliable Computer and a Good Internet Connection.
• Download and Run Zoom BEFORE the Day Of Your Virtual Hearing.
• Use Your Real Name to Login.
• If Your Internet Goes Down, Call In.
• Pay Attention to Your Background!
• Be Careful with Virtual Backgrounds.
• Pay Attention to Your Lighting!
• Pay Attention to Sound!
• Position Your Camera Carefully.
• Dress Appropriately!
• Practice Good Zoom Etiquette.
• Don’t Talk Over Anyone.
• Don’t Chat!
• Don’t Record the Hearing.
• Be Careful Using Breakout Rooms.

Technology can be intimidating. It can also be liberating.

No one knows how long “Zoom court” will be part of our reality. Chances are though, now that courts across the country are getting used to handling cases virtually, they will keep handling some parts of them virtually moving forward.

The convenience that online court hearings provide is just too great to give it up completely.

So whether you’re in the middle of a court case now, or you think you may be part of one in the future, mastering court video conferencing just makes sense. Once you do, you’ll not only be able to manage your virtual court case, you’ll be able to maximize the benefits that appearing in court online provides.

 

Understanding the Role of a Guardian Ad Litem

As a parent, you want what is best for your children. You feel that maintaining the role you have in your child’s life is what is best for your child’s overall well-being and future. You hope that during the divorce experience, nothing about your role in your child’s life changes drastically.

However, given the volatile emotions that can surface during the divorce experience, your place in your child’s life could be threatened by an ex-spouse seeking sole custody of your shared child.

Family courts will act in the best interests of the child, but in order to do that, they often will employ the assistance of a Guardian Ad Litem (GAL). In this excellent blog posting, Daniel Pearce explains what a Guardian Ad Litem is and the process they go through.

Falmouth Mediation is Here to Help

At Falmouth Mediation, I have helped numerous couples with creative co-parenting solutions over the years, and I am available to serve your needs.

I am currently offering extended hours to accommodate major scheduling changes. I provide virtual mediation via teleconferencing or videoconferencing, whichever you prefer. For more information or to schedule a free, no-obligation, private, confidential consultation visit FalmouthMediation.com or call 508-566-4159.